Psychologists have revealed the 6 “red flags” that could lead to a breakup, and contrary to what one might think, cheating is not one of them.
You got dumped but you don’t understand why? Here is a study that might interest you. While a breakup is always difficult (especially when you get dumped and you don’t expect it), psychologists at the University of Liverpool have revealed the six main “red flags” – red flags, considered by men and women as breaking points.
The study , published in December 2022 in the journal Personality and Individual Differences , involved 285 American college students with an average age of 22. They each took two types of assessments: one on the importance of desirable traits in a mate and another on their degree of openness in a relationship. A total of 22 traits presented as ” bits of information you learn about a person that could make you lose interest in the potential partner” were offered to participants.
A total of six traits have been considered the harbingers of a relationship breakup . Each “red flag”, however, differed for long-lasting relationships and for short-term relationships, as well as between men and women.
When it comes to long -term relationships , partner apathy—being inattentive and lacking interest—was the first red flag for both men and women. In second place was having poor hygiene, then being too clingy or too jealous.
- Apathetic;
- Poor hygiene ;
- Too sticky;
- Addict ;
- Unmotivated;
- Promiscuity, that is to say having frequented too many other partners.
Regarding short-term relationships, the ranking was slightly between women and men:
- Lack of hygiene;
- Too sticky;
- Apathetic;
- Unmotivated (for women) / Promiscuity (for men);
- Promiscuous (for women) / Unmotivated (for men).
WOMEN HAVE HIGHER STANDARDS
Psychologists have found that women tend to have higher breakup odds than men. ” Because females have higher rates of obligatory investment in offspring, females tend to maintain higher standards ,” the researchers said.
Conversely, people who were more open to non-committal sex reported fewer “dealbreakers”, i.e. they saw each “red flag” to a lesser extent, making them less difficult.
Manipulators: 6 signs to unmask them
Clever predators, manipulators exploit the vulnerability of their prey to achieve their ends. If they act in a subtle and disguised way, certain signs can help unmask them. How to spot them? Patrice Ras, psychologist gives the keys to thwart them.
Emotional blackmail, blackmailer… We are all potential or occasional manipulators when it comes to currying favor with someone in certain situations. For example, it can be a child who asks for a toy otherwise he won’t do his homework or a mother who asks her children to come see her otherwise she will be alone all weekend.
But for some, manipulation is a mode of operation, a toxic and very pernicious routine for the victims who suffer from it. This can go through:
- you stress ;
- depression;
- isolation;
Most often, the narcissistic manipulator rages in love and it is there that the risk is the highest. But it can also be suffered in other spheres: family, professional, social relationships, etc.
How do you know if he is a manipulator?
To be able to identify it, it is important to give a definition of the manipulator , as well as the mechanism of manipulation: “This form of communication consists in influencing or imposing something on the other in an indirect and negative way , specifies Patrice Ras, morphopsychologist and author of a book on the subject.* Unlike domination where one person imposes something on the other in a clear way, manipulation is … read more
